The Silent Scream: A Lesson from Ace Ventura
In the iconic scene from Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, Jim Carrey’s character frantically opens and closes a sliding glass door while shouting at the top of his lungs. The humor lies in the fact that we only hear him when the door is open. It’s a hilarious moment, but it’s also a powerful metaphor for a universal struggle: feeling like you’re shouting from the rooftops, yet no one hears you. Whether it’s in your personal life, workplace, or community, the frustration of an unheard voice can be deeply disheartening.
Listening Changes Everything
An eye opening example for me was during my time working with teenagers in ministry and as a high-school theology teacher. I quickly learned that teens often act out not because they’re inherently rebellious, but because they feel ignored. Their opinions, dreams, and frustrations seem to fall on deaf ears. Once I started actively listening – truly hearing their perspectives, even when I didn’t agree – their attitudes shifted. Trust grew, respect deepened, and we connected on a profound level.
This experience taught me a universal truth: everyone craves to be heard. Our voices express who we are, what we value, and how we navigate the world. When those voices are ignored, it can feel like a personal rejection, eroding confidence and connection.
My Vocal Cords became my Lifeline
When I got the thyroid cancer diagnosis last year, one of my biggest fears of going into surgery was that I was going to physically lose my voice. I kept asking the surgeon, “so what happens with the vocal cords? Are my vocal cords going to be affected?” As it turns out, post-surgery I did have a “froggy” voice for some time and was almost sent to speech therapy, but thankfully, the Lord intervened, and I got my voice back to normal the day before the appointment!
This ordeal forced me to reflect on why losing my voice felt so terrifying. After much reflection, I concluded that my fear came from not being heard for so long, especially professionally. One of the many reasons I walked away from my career at its prime, was that although I had a senior level position, my voice often went unheeded. I couldn’t influence high-level decisions or advocate sufficiently for my team. Decisions were being made and all I could do was go along and follow the directives. I was having an inner struggle between who I really was and who I was expected to be.
When Your Voice Starts to Fade Away
The impact of being unheard is profound. Professionally, you may disengage, stop contributing in meetings, or retreat into the background, stunting your growth. Personally, it’s even more damaging, straining relationships and fostering resentment. Over time, you might stop speaking up altogether, convinced your voice doesn’t matter. This erosion of confidence can leave you feeling invisible, both to others and to yourself.
Reinventing Myself: I Packed my Bags to Find a New Audience
Once I left my 28 year career, the process of reinventing myself began. At first, it was a blast, because I felt free to manage my own time, do the things that I loved, and explore new opportunities that I would have never considered. I truly enjoyed meeting new people, learning new skills and finding my voice again.
But, as I began peeling the layers to find my real purpose in life, I started to miss my career and those adrenaline packed experiences. I reached out to some people who were still in the industry offering my services of consulting, guidance, or advice, and I was completely ignored. In one fell swoop it became very evident that I was no longer needed or wanted; my expertise was not of value anymore. That was a huge blow to my ego, but it was a gift as well.
God gave me the grace to see that my choice to move on was part of His plan for me, and that my voice was needed elsewhere and in other, more important, capacities. My “audience” needed to change so that my true purpose would flourish as it was meant to be.
Uncovering Your True Voice: The Lion and the Lamb
Rediscovering your voice requires courage, self-awareness, and persistence. It’s about aligning who you are with what you value and expressing it authentically. Here’s how to start:
- Recognize the Signs: Are you being ignored, dismissed, or disrespected when you speak? These are red flags that your voice isn’t being valued. Screaming louder won’t not help – it’s time to reassess.
- Analyze the situation: Take a step back and ask yourself why you are being silenced. Are your ideas off-base, or do you no longer fit in this environment? Could your communication style use refinement? Be honest with yourself.
- Develop a Strategy: If the issue is your communication, seek feedback and work on your skills. If it’s the environment, consider finding a new audience that respects your voice.
- Do Not be Afraid: Walking away from a toxic environment or speaking up after being shut down takes guts. Be bold like a lion, but gentle like a lamb – assertive yet kind.
Dose of Wisdom: Choose Your Circle Wisely
My mother often said, “Dime con quien andas, y te diré quién eres.” – a proverb meaning “Tell me who your friends are, and I’ll tell you who you are.” Motivational Speaker, Jim Rohn echoed this sentiment, stating: “You are the average of the 5 people you spend most time with.” Your environment shapes your behaviors, attitudes, and even your success. Surround yourself with people who listen, challenge you constructively, and value your voice.
You Were Made to Shine!
In Matthew 5:14-15, Jesus tells His disciples “You are the light of the world. A city set on a mountain cannot be hidden. Nor do they light a lamp and then put it under a bushel basket; it is set on a lampstand, where it gives light to all in the house.” Your voice is your light! Don’t let it be dimmed by an audience that doesn’t see its value. Find those who will listen, engage, and grow with you.
Call to Action: Build a Community of Wisdom Seekers
Your voice matters and you were created to shine. If you’re feeling unheard, take the leap to find a new audience – one that will hear, respect, and amplify your voice. Let’s build a community of Wisdom Seekers who lift each other up. Share your story, connect with others, and let your light shine brightly. Remember, YOU ARE NOT ALONE!
If you are interested in joining the community of Wisdom Seekers, you can sign up in our Workshop section in this website. We will contact you with information on future events, workshops and speaker series.
